That time I got lost just to try and find myself

In 2012 I went on an incredible once in a lifetime adventure after one of the toughest moments in my life. After a mental breakdown, I sold my car, took a career break, and bought a one way ticket to Boston. I was going to cycle down to Miami. I didn't really know what I was doing but something was telling me to go and lose myself in order to find a new version of me.

Along the journey I had a lot of time to myself in hotels and motels so I would write up my thoughts on my iPad when I had the mental capacity. Looking back now, I think a lot of my thoughts (although genuine) have probably not stood the test of time. Doing what I did that year put me in a funny frame of mind in those moments. In each chapter I have updated it with my retrospective thoughts of what I feel I really learned from that chapter and how it has impacted my life today.

State 1

Massachusetts

"Lost"

Chapter 1

State 2

Connecticut

"WTF am I doing?"

Chapter 2

State 3

New York

"Get me out of here!"

Chapter 3

State 4

New Jersey

"Gun shots and police"

Chapter 4

State 5

Pennsylvania

"Wrong side of the tracks"

Chapter 5

State 6

Delaware

"Being followed"

Chapter 6

State 7

Maryland

"When it rains"

Chapter 7

State 8

Virginia

"The ghost dog"

Chapter 8

State 9

North Carolina

"Ready to quit"

Chapter 9

State 10

South Carolina

"A turning of a page"

Chapter 10

State 11

Georgia

"Woosah"

Chapter 11

State 12

Florida

"Found"

The final chapter

The most sobering thought is
what if this adventure never happened?

So what came out of this journey?

I hand on heart and with chest, would say that I would not be where I am if I didn't do what I did in 2012. I manifested a life changing fork in life's road. It wasn't thrusted upon me, I created that moment. That scared me. How scary yet amazing is it that a moment you create from nothing can change the trajectory of your life?

The people I have met, the person I have become for my family, my career. These things have all been directly impacted by what I did in 2012. My friend who I stayed with in Mandarin passed away 3 months after I stayed with him along the journey. Before I left he told me to always smile and be a more open person. A smile is something that can never be taken away from you. The smile I wear today comes from that advice.

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